Towersey resident shares child abuse experiences
Dear Editor, As a Towersey resident, I would like to share my views on this subject, and in particular, respond to the letter headed ?Plea for help and support for Sex Offender?. My response has been delayed, firstly because I did not want to act in fury and secondly this is not something I could write about in a few spare minutes, it takes a lot of thought and courage.
I would firstly like to say ?thank god? the child has a supportive family and was ?listened to?. I can only thank the family for their courage where others fail, in proceeding with what needed to be done and that it was brought to all of our attention. Although Towersey is a close knit community, we all have the right to know if there is a danger to our children living amongst us. I have a son and like any other parent I wish to protect my child, NOT to protect paedophiles like Nick Graves! It?s ?do-gooders? like the author?s of the ?said letter? who create the playground for paedophiles and they are obviously unaware about the implications and the effects child sexual abuse has on a person.
As a victim and now survivor of child sexual abuse, I am shocked that the authors of the said letter attempt to ?measure the damage caused to the child?. For the authors to describe the damage as ?minimal?, I would like to bring their attention to the fact that the only thing ?minimal? about this incident would be the childs understanding of what has happened to him, today! As the child grows and matures so does the understanding of the actual act, nature and position he was tricked into by someone he trusted. In my particular case, my abuse was 30years ago and to this day it still has a significant bearing on my life. Feeling disgusting about yourself, low self worth, if any, and the damage it could cause to any future relationships are just the tip of the iceberg!
As for children making ?mischievous complaints? and ?no substance to them?, Nick Graves was found guilty in a Court of Law of sexually assaulting a child. The days of children being ?seen and not heard? has gone! Obviously there is substance in this particular case, so what a bizarre statement to make in their plea. Also they make a plea for ?forgiveness? for Nick Graves. In my experience, forgiveness comes from within, but you truly have to admit to yourself you have done wrong, and from what I can gather, Nick Graves only accepts that he has been found guilty, and did not admit he WAS guilty. How can he possibly forgive himself, or expect anyone else too?
The Sentence Nick Graves has received from the Court, is just another manipulation, but of the system. It was his choice to destroy his future and reputation through his actions alone. My heart goes out to the child and his family, because they didn?t have a choice. Their lives have been turned upside down through no fault of their own and Nick Graves has tarnished their memories of the wonderful times they?ve had in this village and they all have to live with what he has done and for the child, that means for life!
Louise ? Towersey Resident
